Marriage Isn’t Always Easy (Part 2)

Let’s continue now into looking at “leaving home” and what that really means.
Remember: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” – Genesis 2:24
When the man leaves his home, he gives up that part of his life as a child and in marriage now becomes a man. With his becoming a man, comes responsibilities that revolve around his marriage and wife.
Leave home emotionally. Good news at work is first shared with your spouse, not your parent. If you need to process a decision, talk it through with your spouse before calling a parent. If you call a parent, don’t allow Mom’s or Dad’s feelings on the matter to trump your spouse’s. Newlyweds do not need to call or text home every day to debrief their happenings in life. Just as you need physical and relational space, you need emotional distance, too.
Leave home financially. This, like leaving home physically, is a tangible boundary. It’s time to give back your parents’ credit cards and blaze your own financial trail. One of the greatest mistakes young marrieds make is wanting to have in three years what their parents spent 30 years accumulating. Live within your means. Work hard, give graciously, save diligently and then spend happily. You’ve got this!
Leave home spiritually. When did your parents’ faith become your own? Being raised in a Christian home and going to church your whole life does not make you a Christian. Faith in Christ alone leads to salvation. Have you both made that decision? Your family heritage does not bring you into a right relationship with God. Personal faith in Jesus saves you.
When necessary, leave home geographically. This will accelerate your cleaving. It will be fun when your parents visit your apartment and could see that you are more than making it. It’s one of the best ways to honor your parents — it’s as though you are were saying, “Thank you, Mom and Dad, for teaching us how to do this.”
One final word of encouragement: After you leave home and cleave to your spouse, the need to return home may present itself later in life. The health of your parents, a job loss, marital crisis or short-term transition may cause you to return home. Please keep in mind that your return is just for a season; your marriage is for a lifetime.

In part 3 we will look deeper at Ecclesiastes 4:12: “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” and then we will explore what it really means by “leaving and cleaving” and what that looks like.
To be continued…