Christmas isn’t What You See on TV. We want to believe some of it—maybe a little, maybe even all of it—but deep down we know it’s not.

Most of us haven’t lived “Hallmark” lives. We haven’t shared a house with Scrooge or the Grinch. None of us have flown in Santa’s sleigh or been chased by two bumbling fools in a holiday comedy. Those stories entertain us, but they don’t capture the whole truth.

Because Christmas isn’t only gifts, trees, snow, lights, and more.

It’s also being real in the moment.

The Light and the Shadows

Christmas is joy—the kind that sneaks up on us in ordinary ways.

• The laughter around a table when someone tells a story we’ve all heard before.
• The warmth of a hug that says, I’m glad you’re here.
• The sparkle in a child’s eyes when the lights flicker on.
• The quiet peace of sitting in front of the tree, letting its glow remind us of hope.

But Christmas is also sorrow.

• Empty chairs that remind us of loved ones gone.
• Broken relationships that ache more sharply against the backdrop of “perfect family” commercials.
• Financial strain that makes generosity feel heavy.
• Loneliness that whispers louder when the world seems to be celebrating together.

The season holds both light and shadow. And both are real.

The Paradox We Carry

Christmas is joy and grief. Celebration and longing. Connection and loneliness.

It is not one or the other—it is both. And that paradox is what makes it human.

When we stop chasing the scripted version, we can embrace the authentic one—the one where we acknowledge our reality, honor our losses, and still notice the small sparks of hope.

A Gentle Permission

So if your Christmas doesn’t look like the movies, that’s okay. If it feels messy, complicated, or bittersweet, that’s okay. If it holds both laughter and tears, that’s okay.

Because Christmas isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence. It’s about being here, now, in whatever your Christmas looks like.

And that is enough.

Thanks for stopping by the fire,

Coach Dennis